This particular post will strike home to an unusually large amount of people. Who hasn’t stared at an image of some of these instagram fitness models, pro body builders or Victoria secret models and found yourself comparing your body to theirs? If you’ve never done that, you can quit reading this post now because you don’t apparently have body image issues or you need to be more honest with yourself. In today’s world it is very hard not to wonder, “why can’t I look like that” when scrolling through a magazine or instagram. So today we are going to talk about body image issues that impact (or have impacted) almost everyone at some point in their lives.
First off, it would be awesome if we could just turn that part of our brains off that is constantly comparing ourselves to someone else, but that’s usually not the case. What we do have to do is remind ourselves that we are not perfect but we are striving to improve (or are improving hopefully). We also need to realize that the amount of work that goes into creating these seemingly “natural” or “I woke up like this” post are usually far from simple. Are there genetically gifted, talented and extremely hard workers out there that really do look that good?…Yes, but they are few and far between.
The amount of work that goes into a single instagram fitness model’s post is insane. Lighting, backdrop, striking 300 different poses from different angles to get the perfect shot that makes my abs look perfect. Anyone in the business will likely tell you the same, it is usually a lot of work for a single shot, now multiply that by the 20 or so shots they post a day and you have a full days work. Don’t get me wrong, there are plenty of people out there who look great from any angle and don’t have to put a whole lot of thought into their photos, but those people are the 1% and in most instances they do this for a living or are taking something to “help” their efforts. This post is going to tie back in to the principle of realistic goals and expectations.
Don’t even get me started on Hollywood or advertisements. Arnold himself has admitted to taking steroids in the past and is now paying the price in his later years (heart problems). Not only do many actors/actresses use illicit substances to get in shape fast, but you have to remember they generally don’t STAY at that level at all times. They are also literally being paid millions of dollars to look that good, so they gotta do what they gotta do. Chris Hemsworth for instance is a beast when he plays Thor, but if you look at him in other movies or on social media between shoots you will see he has a much more reasonable physique. If you’re not being paid millions to have a God-like body (don’t get me wrong, these people are talented actors/actresses for which they also get paid for) then you need to stop comparing yourself to people who are.
So how do we overcome this urge to compare our bodies to others? We don’t…this is not something that can easily be shut off. What we CAN do is realize the amount of work, money and time that these fitness models, actors, actresses put into their physique and realize that is not a realistic goal for the average person. I’d love to say “you need to love your body for what it is” but that’s also easier said than done.
After years of striving for the unobtainable I have found methods that allow me to be more comfortable with my body. Even when I was down to 10% or less body fat I would still nitpick every little thing about my body I viewed as a flaw. I have realized that every one of our bodies is very unique. Especially the way we are built in a musculoskeletal sense. I might have the same size pectoral muscles as some other guy in the gym, but his will look 75% better, why? There are muscle insertion genetics at play and also just the way our muscles sit on our body. Some people will say “oh you just need to do X exercise and your pecs will look like that”…in some cases yes, usually no. You can theoretically target certain areas of the muscles and develop them slightly more than others, but if your insertion genetics or they way your muscle sits on your frame is not similar to another persons, you will not look the same.
The best way to overcome our body image issues is to START comparing ourselves to…ourselves! Look in the mirror, take a few moments to pick out a few areas you would like to improve on and make REALISTIC goals to improve those areas. You also need to ask yourself if this is something you CAN improve. For instance, no matter how many squats or cardio you do or if you purposefully skip hip focused exercises, you will not shrink your hips if you have wide hips. For instance, I have a naturally blocky appearance to my waist and lower abdomen, so I will never have that dramatic V-taper that people strive for even if I build my chest and lats to enormous sizes (although this would help). Even when down to 5% body fat I still have high and wide set hip/pelvic bones and my obliques are very prominent (gives me a wider appearance even if my abs are popping through the skin). If you used to weigh 500 pounds and have lost a lot of weight you will never get rid of that “flat tire” appearance that is loose skin (not without plastic surgery at least). You need to pick things you CAN change and start working on them.
The point here is to make realistic goals and expectations and work on SELF improvement. Don’t try to obtain what someone else has or you will usually be disappointed. Don’t say “well I will never look like that so I quit.” Pick a few small goals at a time and focus on them. If the person looking back in the mirror is a slightly better version of yourself in a month or so, then you can slowly become more and more satisfied with your own body image. You will learn to love your body more and more because it is an improvement from your prior self. Self-improvement becomes as addicting as the “wishing you looked like Thor” that you used to do, except now you are actually focused on a more healthy and self-loving addiction.
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